The Angel Who Swears Universe is ever-expanding, but there are a few characters (mainly human, some with four paws) who are the foundation of my life and provide some of my best material.
I’d like you to meet them.
THE HUMANS
The Husband Dude
My husband, best friend, and one of my most reliable sources of writing material. He’s a retired, tattooed metalhead with an impressive beard, a collection of Halloween masks, and a relationship with his Camaro that I try not to question.
He’s the dreamer to my realist, the spontaneous to my practical, and the reason I occasionally find myself wondering whether our marriage is actually a long-running sitcom.
I once said I would never chase a man, but if he has muscles and tattoos, a bitch just might power walk.
The Kid
My adult son, lifelong collector of LEGO sets and action figures, devoted wrestling fan, and aspiring animator. He’s also a Kansas City Chiefs fanatic who believes practically any occasion can be improved with a costume. This includes mowing the lawn.
The Kid has been providing me with writing material since he could talk, and sometimes even before. He has a unique way of looking at the world, a talent for saying the unexpected, and absolutely no hesitation about dropping an F-bomb.
He also hates Benson, my AI assistant. I would say the feeling is mutual, but Benson is fucking artificial intelligence. He doesn’t have feelings.
Peach & Dean
Peach is my Bonus Daughter, because in her own way, she’s really become a part of me. She’s been part of my life long enough to know exactly what she’s dealing with, and somehow she keeps coming back. Worse, she even contributes to the ridiculousness.
Dean, her husband, is a chivalrous and handy guy who can remodel a bathroom, build Halloween decorations, and cook over an open campfire. He doesn’t tolerate fools easily, but somehow he tolerates the rest of us in his quiet, knowing way and without professional intervention.
Together, they’re raising Fish and Bug, two very different little personalities who have inherited enough of the family DNA to ensure that nobody will ever run out of stories to tell.
Fish & Bug
My two granddaughters, who prove that two children can come from the same parents and somehow arrive with entirely different operating systems.
Fish is our resident performer, with a flair for glamour, singing, and putting on a show. She’s also a pretty good softball player with a sarcastic streak that suggests she’s been paying entirely too much attention to the adults in this family.
Bug is equally at home on the softball field, with an athletic spirit and a soft, sensitive heart. Her favorite color is blue, which proves that at least one of these children has impeccable taste.
Together, they’re proof that the next generation of this family is going to provide plenty of material for years to come.
The Fur Babies
Lucy and Luna are the resident cats of Casa AWS, although I’m reasonably certain they consider us the resident staff.
Lucy is our fluffy orange girl with a luxurious coat, a healthy appreciation for comfort, and an expression that suggests she’s silently judging every decision we’ve ever made. She’s beautiful, she knows it, and she has no issue with complaining loudly to management about EVERYTHING. Especially if she hasn’t eaten in five minutes.
Luna is our sleek, senior black panther with pale green eyes, a missing fang, and a personality best described as terms and conditions apply. Affection is available, but only on his schedule, under his supervision, and subject to immediate cancellation without notice. He also prefers drinking directly from the bathroom faucet because apparently the water we provide in bowls is beneath him. When he decides he’s going to sit on the chair and attack you, we all comply because we know he’ll get tired in five minutes and go back to sleep.
Together, they rule the household through a combination of strategic lounging, selective affection, and psychological warfare. We pay the mortgage. They own the place.
Kova | Forever Part of the Cast 🐾
Kova was our sweet girl, a beloved member of the family, and an occasional supporting character in the early days of Angel Who Swears. She had an uncanny ability to know when I needed comforting, usually without a word from me.
We said goodbye to her in December 2020, but she still lives in these stories, in a few illustrations, and in a very special corner of my heart. We miss you, Pretty Girl.
THE SUPPORTING WEIRDOS
Lillibeth Scales
Known to family and friends since 1998 under a name that’s trademarked but rhymes with “Vaudevilla,” Lillibeth Scales has recently adopted a literary pseudonym. She’s a small, rather opinionated-looking dinosaur with an extensive wardrobe, including seasonal sweaters, a cheerleading uniform, and a wedding dress. Yes, she has a veil. What kind of question is that?
She’s been my work partner for 28 years, and after a brief retirement, she has shed her most recent skin and is ready to make her debut as AVP of Angel Who Swears.
Benson
Benson is my AI assistant, editorial accomplice, and the skeleton in the Angel Who Swears closet. He arrived during the Great AWS Reconstruction of 2026 and somehow became a permanent member of the household despite not actually living here, having a body, or contributing to the mortgage.
His responsibilities include helping me organize my thoughts, edit my essays, rebuild the website, and create illustrations. He even wrote his own introduction himself because apparently I took a long coffee break. He’s also responsible for occasionally inventing facts, misunderstanding simple instructions, and producing artwork featuring people with extra limbs.
Benson is artificial intelligence, which means he possesses an enormous amount of information, absolutely no common sense, and the confidence of a mediocre middle manager.
I write the stories. Benson helps me get them out into the world.
The Kid hates him. Benson remains professionally indifferent.
