Angel Who Swears

Commentary from a reformed good girl

Want More?

Subscribe. Get notified. Keep laughing.

Don't worry, I won't spam you or stalk you. Unless you're into that.
Freak.

Maybe I’m Supposed To Be Here

By: 18 Comments

I’m sort of afraid to write this post, because I’m afraid if I gush a little too much, I’m going to jinx myself and everything will go to shit as it has done in the past. This whole blog, though, is about my life and what’s happening in it, so I feel like I’m not being transparent if I don’t at least mention how things are going.

So…you may recall that I started a new job about a month and a half ago. It’s the same industry but just a much smaller company. So small, in fact, that there are exactly nine people in my whole office.

Well, ten if you include Sarge, which I do, because I’m probably happiest when he’s in the office!

Sarge

I’d be lying if I said it hasn’t been a real eye opener going from the largest insurance carrier in the country to a company of nine, with a brief stop at something in-between. I’ve gone from being an “alias” of four letters that was my identification at Satan’s Butthole for seventeen years, to being a name and a person with actual feelings and needs.

I mean, obviously, there’s some degree of security with a big company and along with that, some perks. They have money to spend. Or in the case of Not-Satan’s Butthole, they have some money to spend and they’re going to show it off with big fancy parties and the occasional gift, rather than giving you something in your paycheck.

Those are things I don’t have now. This company could go belly-up tomorrow and I’d be out looking for work again. I’m not going to get a $200 LL Bean ski jacket for Christmas or a $200 Visa gift card for being “called out” as a star employee like I did last year. There aren’t going to be any big fancy holiday parties or employee lunches or a select-a-gifts like I got for years and years.

I don’t have those things now, but there isn’t a day that goes by that the owner of the company doesn’t walk in and thank us for something. Yesterday, he walked in and thanked me for making the coffee. Then we sat around and brainstormed some things together. He told me he appreciated my input.

The owner of the company.

I don’t have all those fancy things, or even a title really. It’ll be a while before I get a “promotion” with any kind of title, but that’s okay because we all joke about “promotions” anyway. Around here, everybody wears multiple hats and nobody is too important to tackle a “menial” task. When you get handed another hat to wear, that’s your “promotion”.

I’m already wearing three hats. Strangely enough, though, I’m not stressed out about it. I’m not overworked and I’m certainly not underpaid. I’m learning so much and I’m challenged in ways that are making life interesting again. I’m out of my rut.

The bosses are giving us our holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas) with an additional day added to each. They will answer phones and handle any business that comes in on those extra days because they don’t want us to have to take paid time off just to have time with our families. We’ll celebrate as coworkers with a food day and possibly ugly sweaters.

See what I mean? We are people, not numbers. That’s worth a lot more than a fancy jacket or a huge party.

It occurred to me as I was driving to work this morning that my life has always managed to work itself in directions I didn’t anticipate would be good for me. I often complain and get anxious when things change or a curveball gets thrown at me, but the universal truth of my life is that sometimes that’s what it takes to knock me out of my complacency and my comfort zone into a better direction.

Satan’s Butthole blessed me in many ways, monetarily, and certainly with life-long friends and “family”. Not-Satan’s Butthole pulled me out of the horrible situation that Satan’s Butthole had become and offered a refuge of sorts for a while. Even though it de-evolved quickly into a very unhappy situation, I again made good friends and I also made good connections that got me to where I am now.

Of course, nothing is perfect and I’m sure once I’m out of the honeymoon stage, I’ll have my complaints and there will be things that stress and irritate me. But I’ll remind myself of the YEARS I spent hating life and wishing my life away so I could be old enough to finally retire and get out of HELL. I’ll remind myself that there was a time when it was just enough to get paid a decent wage, be interested in my work, and rub the belly of an old, blind dog named Sarge.

Because, really, that’s worth its weight in gold.

Stay weird, my friends. Normal is boring!

Have you followed me on social media?

Get a daily dose of humor on my Facebook and Twitter pages, check out snippets of my life on Instagram, and find all kinds of funny, weird, useful things on my Pinterest.

I want to see you there!

Comments

  2. I feel the same way about Hub’s job with The Big Swedish Company.

    For the first time in 20 someodd years, he is actually appreciated for the hard worker that he is. His paycheck is less than what he made at Satan’s Pricetag (which I think is what I’m going to call the company he worked for for most of those 20 someodd years from now on). But I’m OK with that because they don’t treat him like shit. They don’t act as if he’s replaceable by the next goon who walks through the door. He’s not expected to pull 18-24-36 hr shifts during the holidays (yes, this has been a thing. He once got a shitload of overtime because he had to work 36 straight hours. Which is not sane or good for ANYONE, least of all an overworked, underpaid retail manager).

    Does he get stock certificates that “vest” in 5 years that he can cash in? No. Does he get shitty gifts that nobody really wants because he’s put in his time of however many years it takes to earn said shitty gift? No. Does he have to hope and pray that the losses that quarter were small enough that he gets a bonus? No. Does he have to work his ass off to prove that he’s the best and his store is the best so he can spend a shitty week in Florida with other managers going “We don’t suck. Yay us?” No.

    But what he DOES get–a work schedule that’s actually super decent, health insurance that has a copay instead of a crazy high deductible for a change, being treated like an actual person..these are the things that I love about The Big Swedish Company. They are very family focused and I LOVE the shit out of it. It’s been so long since he’s been treated well and had a boss who wasn’t an asshole that if he ever leaves or (gods forbid) gets fired, I will kick his ass into the middle of next week and then turn around and kick his ass again on Thursday.

    Reply

  3. I am super happy that you have upgraded to a place where people matter. What a difference!

    The place Coach has worked for over 20 years got bought which was great because he is a partner and we got money for the sale. Now with new owners (who are just trying to make the company bigger for another sale) he is dealing with massive micromanaging. Total suckiness! Once they sell again, we will take our slice and skedaddle. Counting down until God knows when.

    As for me, I have been in a midlife lack-of-career crisis for a few years. My dream: get a memoir published. In the meantime, don’t quit your day job, righ? I babysit in my house mostly for teachers. Does that sound annoying? Because lately that is EXACTLY what it is. Been at it for 5 yrs.

    I stayed home to raise our 6 kids forever. Now my resume sucks and my degree is just a piece of paper. If my book deal turned ‘let’s make this a movie’ thing happens – well, that will be AMAZING. But really? I try not to calculate the chances.

    Instead I write when I can and worry we live in a messy pit because I am wasting my time. (Softly sobbing). And everyone elses’s jobs sound exciting, ‘Oh, insurance! Awesome!’

    Reply

    • Oh Good Lord…there’s NOTHING exciting about insurance! LOL. But it is what it is and I try to find the interesting parts where I can. I’m totally with you on the memoir thing. I would love to publish a book that became a hit, but for now it’s all about the day job! Hang in there!

      Reply

  6. I’m so happy things are going better for you! 15 years ago I started my job, it was a small company then, only 5 people. I still work here and it’s down to 2 of us plus the boss. It’s been the best experience I’ve had at a job. Because we’re so small it ends up being more of a family feel and my boss is much more understanding when things come up.

    I hope your new job continues to be awesome!

    Reply

  7. I kinda feel the same way. It’s good when we can sit down, take a breath, and think “maybe life won’t be horrible for a minute”. We were at the Butthole so long, we forgot what other places can be like. I’m still gingerly holding my breath, though.

    Reply

    • Me too. I thought things were going to be great at the last place and it turned into a shit show pretty quickly. Praying that doesn’t happen here!

      Reply

  8. There is nothing better than working at a company that clearly values their employees and treats them as partners, so to speak, in the success of the business. This is usually only experienced in small companies/start-ups. Unfortunately, in my experience, that is also the way companies succeed and grow. Once they do then it turns into Satan. After 16 years of guiding a company to experiencing almost half a billion in revenue yearly, I have never felt so unappreciated, taken for granted and burned out. So I am hoping your company stays small, you get to pet the dog and go home at the end of the day happy and fulfilled!

    Reply

  9. One day I may have the guts to leave too. But I’m hoping to tough it out for 3 more years and retire instead. Then I want to be a Gramma type person at a day care….

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAAA!!!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Archives

Categories