Reason Number 2,536 That I Hate People

One thing you should know about me is that I detest drama. The only thing I detest more than drama is Facebook drama. How does it manage to always find me? Oh yeah…because I don’t bend over backwards to spare people’s feelings when they couldn’t give two shits about mine.

Let me set the stage. Remember all those memes I posted about the weather here in Oklahoma? Flooding, tornadoes, all that good stuff? I had posted this particular one on my personal Facebook page:

That’s when drama found me in the form of a Facebook acquaintance. I say “acquaintance” because this is a person I’ve probably only met “in real life” once or twice and it was through The Husband Dude. They went to the same high school (different classes). At some point, we friended each other on Facebook.

I should preface this by saying that this person and I don’t really seem to have a lot in common. The only similar interest I can think of off the top of my head is our love of animals. So, you can imagine that when we post things, we have a high probability of not agreeing with what the other person thinks, since we’re not similar in very many ways.

That’s perfectly ok, as far as I’m concerned. I can be your friend in sharing one similar interest and ignore the other 576 things we don’t have in common or see eye to eye on. As long as those 576 things don’t get flopped around in my face all the time.

Take politics, for example. I can be friends with people whose views are completely opposite of mine, as long as we don’t ever talk politics.

It’s no secret, though, that Facebook is the place people like to go to spout off their opinions about politics. It’s really hard to like people sometimes when their posts go so far against what you think or believe or when it’s just spiteful or hateful about the things you believe in. But guess what? There’s a solution to that.

It’s called an “unfollow” button. You don’t have to unfriend them to use this handy little tool. They still see you on their friends list but you don’t have to see their batshit crazy Flat Earth opinions. And if one of their posts happens to show up on your timeline and you read it and go, “Oh my God…this person is one enchilada short of a combination platter”?

Let me introduce you to a handy little tool (and apparently the trigger of this whole story I’m trying to tell you). It’s called a “scroll bar” and every browser on a smart phone, tablet or computer has one!

When I see something that makes me want to hide in a bunker with foil wrapped around my head for the next fifty years I don’t like or agree with, I don’t stop to dish hate on the person. I don’t comment my opposing opinion and start a fight. I don’t tell them, “I think it’s time to take a long vacation in a very soft room with a nice white jacket on.” I just scroll. And scroll. And scroll some more.

Now, I’m not going to say I’ve NEVER stopped to comment. There are some things in life we need to stand up for and there are stupidities that need to be called out, friendship be damned. I do that when it needs to be done. I’m just saying that ninety-five percent of the crap you see on social media isn’t worth the time and effort and hurt feelings it takes to get into an argument.

Which brings me back to my story and the Facebook acquaintance. When this person posts political things that make me want to go live in the woods, far, far away from people that I don’t agree with…wait for it…I just scroll on by! I don’t stop to comment. I don’t troll them by starting a shitstorm argument in their comments section. I don’t post ridiculous memes that supposedly contain facts but nobody has actually researched (even though that’s what a lot of people do when they just can’t help themselves).

I just scroll.

So imagine my surprise when I wasn’t afforded the same courtesy.

Actually, it doesn’t surprise me at all. People don’t surprise me anymore because people suck.

Anyway, back to Facebook. I understand my role here. There’s so much bullshit in the world, that you really don’t need me to be serious too often. There’s enough of that going around. My role is to make you (and myself) laugh. I always said that was my goal for this blog. This blog is our happy place where you can forget all that other crap, if only for a couple of minutes.

I have two Facebook pages. One is to promote this blog. On the days I don’t post a blog, I try to post funny things on that Facebook page. The other page is my personal one. My posts there are a little more broad but mostly are pictures of me, my family, my pets, weird things I come across and funny stuff that makes me laugh.

So…I’ll let you see exactly what happened when I posted this meme:

So I look at this response and my first thought was, she didn’t read the meme properly. She thinks I’m talking about all Oklahomans going to the lake this Memorial Day and she is pointing out that some people have to work.

Don’t ask me why I thought that. I just know there are people in the world who take things very literally (my son being one of them) and sometimes they need a little “nudge” to see the humor in the joke. So here is my nudge:

Apparently, that didn’t go over as I intended, based on the response:

I’m not going to lie. That last comment had me triggered. I hate the term “triggered” because of the modern connotation and association with people who get butthurt about everything, but “triggered” is the best description of what I’m feeling with this comment.

You may be thinking I was insulted by being told my post was “poor taste”. Um. Have you met me?

No, my trigger was being told I was “making fun” of a situation.

Here’s the thing. There’s a HUGE difference to me between trying to find some humor in a situation and making fun of a situation. To me, making fun of something means to maliciously mock it for the sole purpose of hurting someone or several someones. It’s the difference between laughing at someone versus laughing with them.

We here in Oklahoma are dealing with some horrendous situations right now. Every county in our state is under a state of emergency right now, either due to historic flooding or tornadoes, or both. So many people have lost homes. They even showed a family on the news who left their home that was flooded only for the place they were staying to get hit by a tornado less than a week later!

For someone to insinuate that my attempt to laugh with Oklahoma was actually laughing at Oklahoma really stung. Then it pissed me off.

Something you should know about me, if you don’t already, is that I use humor as a coping mechanism. I suspect I’m not the only one, considering how many jokes and funnies and humorous things I saw Oklahomans posting on social media that had to do with the storms and the flooding.

I work in a job that brings me up close and personal with people who are experiencing traumatic situations they had no control over. It isn’t on the same level as doctors, nurses, or first responders, but it has its share of stress and heartache.

Not every situation is horrendous, but there have been days where every phone call is me talking to someone having the worst day of their lives.

There was the man whose estranged wife got drunk and tripped or passed out in front of the fireplace and set herself and the curtains on fire. She didn’t survive.

There was the family that was taking shelter in a school gym because their entire town in Kansas had been wiped out by a tornado that struck earlier that morning.

There was the lady whose husband with Stage 4 cancer took his pistol with him to the shower and killed himself there so that he wouldn’t make a mess.

There’s the landlord who found his elderly tenant that had been dead and decomposing for a month because there was no family to check on them.

There was the lady whose house was a burned out shell and the firemen came out and told her they had found her dogs. They were dead in their crates.

I’ve looked into the cold, dark eyes of a man I was ninety-nine percent sure had rolled a bale of hay over, killing his four year old to collect benefits from his employer’s liability policy, and there was nothing we could do to prove it.

Something that not many people know about me is that I’ve spent a pretty fair amount of time sitting by myself in a bathroom stall, crying my eyes out. Humor is what helps me wipe my face, wash my hands, and go back to that desk to take another phone call. Humor is what keeps me from taking a long drive off a short bridge.

So back to Facebook. I’ve been accused of posting something in poor taste and of making fun of the devastating flooding here in the state. It was time to have a “Come to Jesus” meeting.

Isn’t it funny that this person can drop their truth bomb on me, but they can’t handle it when I drop mine on them?

I ended the thread with this, though I don’t think they read it because they promptly unfriended me after I dared to tell them that sometimes I don’t like their posts either, but instead of commenting, I just keep scrolling.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t the end of that.

I had forgotten the whole exchange by that evening when I was happily eating dinner and catching up on TV shows.

The Husband Dude: So…you and A had a little tiff today?

Me: Oh, yeah…I forgot to tell you about that. Did you read it on my page?

THD: No. I haven’t read it yet. She sent me a message.

Me:

THD: Yeah. While I’m at work, trying to fucking move equipment so it doesn’t get flooded in our barn.

Me: What did she say?

THD: She said you and she exchanged words and that I could read it on your page and that she had to unfriend you. She said she made an innocent comment on something you posted and I guess you were rude to her?

Me:

THD: She said she deals with someone rude and condescending everyday and doesn’t need another one.

Me: She doesn’t need another one? As in, she doesn’t need ME being rude and condescending?

THD: I guess? And then she said she unfriended you so you wouldn’t have to see her posts anymore…

Me: Well, that was generous of her.

THD: …and then she said she hopes she and I can still be friends.

Me:

Also me: Let me get this straight. She makes a rude comment on MY Facebook page and calls it an innocent comment, then she unfriends me when I get real with her, and THEN SHE HAS THE FUCKING TATAS TO PRIVATE MESSAGE MY HUSBAND AND INSINUATE I’M RUDE AND CONDESCENDING AND THEN IN THE SAME BREATH TELL HIM SHE SHE HOPES TO STILL BE FRIENDS WITH HIM???

THD:

Me:

I don’t know on what planet you think a man would let you insult his wife and still be friends with you when you started the shit in the first place.

Maybe Planet-Never-Going-To-Have-Sex-With-My-Wife-Again.

Or Planet-I’m-Gonna-Cut-A-Bitch.

Apparently, she thinks she bears no responsibility in this little fabricated teen-like drama that could’ve been avoided if she had just kept scrolling.

And that, my friends, is reason number 2,536 that I hate people.

Stay weird, my friends. Normal is boring.