So I’ve been adulting pretty hard lately, what with the whole day job and all. I guess it’s about time. I am forty-seven years old, after all.
Of course, I could argue that I’ve had to adult from a very young age because my parents really needed at least one kid to tow the line and do what they were supposed to, but that’s neither here nor there.
When I found out Satan’s Butthole was pulling up stakes and leaving Tulsa, and that I would be unemployed, I sort of checked out mentally and took a hiatus from reality.
Well, not really, but I did imagine that I would start a blog, develop a following and then write a bestselling book. All in that order.
I haven’t given up on that. Not at all. I just realized (in a very adult way) that things come in their own time and this writing thing is going to take a minute. In the meantime, I’ve got bills to pay and mouths to feed and a teenager who is dreaming of being a YouTube star, so I need to let him be a teenager and have his dreams while I do the actual real work of paying bills.
That’s where my new job comes in. I’ve been adulting so hard, I even do work at home. The rewards have been worth it, but it definitely takes commitment.
Of course, nothing says adulting like keeping your mouth shut when all you want to do is spew verbal diatribes like Mt. St. Helens spewing lava circa 1980. If you know me, you know I’m not scared of verbal sparring. One might say I am rather good at it.
But life and circumstances sometimes dictate a different way of handling things and I adulted really hard and kept my mouth shut over something that I really had a lot to say about. I didn’t even drop an F bomb.
I know. Right???
I rewarded myself with a bottle of Pink Moscato that actually served a dual purpose.
First, I was treating myself for putting my Big Girl panties on and actually wearing them for longer than a few minutes.
Second, I had yet to take advantage of Oklahoma’s new laws that allow us to buy our beer and wine at the grocery and convenience store.
If you’re not from Oklahoma, I sense you are looking at your screen like this:
Pull up a chair, kiddies, and let me tell you about a state in the middle of Tornado Alley that is also in the middle of The Bible Belt.
You can draw your own conclusions from that little coincidence. I’m not here for a philosophical discussion.
Let me tell you the story of a 28 year old woman who packed up her three cats and everything she owned, quit her job, and moved 900 miles to a land where tattoos were illegal, gambling and lotteries were illegal, and beer had so little alcohol in it, that it was really just off-color water.
Then the voters legalized casinos on Indian Reservations and lotteries. And on the eighth day, The Hard Rock Casino was built. And it was good.
Then we were the last state to legalize tattoos. And all the tattoo artists in Missouri, Arkansas, Texas, Kansas, and New Mexico saw a steep decline in business.
Then The People spoke: “We want to get our buzz on, and we want it now.”
And they legalized six point beer, and made sure you could purchase it cold in every grocery and convenience store, along with wine. Signs like this popped up everywhere:
And just like that, medical marijuana was legalized. Now you can have your brownies and eat them too.
Mark my words. We’ll have flying cars soon too. The future is now.
But I digress.
I rewarded my adulting with a bottle of Barefoot Pink Moscato purchased at Reasors (our local grocery chain). And I drank it out of a skull glass.
Because I can.
Maybe someday I’ll be an adult and buy real wine glasses.
Or maybe I’ll treat myself to these:
In any case, I’m not a “glass half empty” or “glass half full” kind of girl.
I’m more of a “drink up, bitches, and order some more!” kind of girl.
Stay weird, my friends. Normal is boring.
Rivergirl1211 says
October 23, 2018 at 8:51 amSorry, but I’m still having a hard time wrapping my head around the idea anyone would move to Oklahoma on purpose…
Aside from that, I’m glad your state has moved into the 21rst century so you can browse aisle 12 thirsty like the rest of us.
And yes, adulting certainly sucks.
But drinking wine from a skull glass is a step in the right direction…
Kat says
October 23, 2018 at 6:48 pmOk…now I feel like I have to defend my adopted home state of Oklahoma! I’ve actually grown to love it here enough to overlook the things I despise, if that makes any sense. People always picture it flat and desolate here, but I live in Northeastern Oklahoma where it’s actually quite green and pretty with some rolling hills. I live in a small city that’s actually kind of a suburb of Tulsa, which isn’t a large city either, but they both have a lot of attractions you would find in a big city. Tulsa has a 20,000 seat arena that is in the top 15 for sales worldwide, and has attracted acts like Paul McCartney, Celine Dion, Lady Gaga, Metallica, Elton John and many, many more. My hometown of El Paso, which is a much larger city, can’t even boast that. There is a really cool arts and entertainment scene here and some of the best hospitals and schools in the country. The people, for the most part, are friendly and you can live a small town life while being close to big city attractions. So, there are a lot of good things to love about Oklahoma! With that being said, we have definitely been a little old fashioned in the vice department, but we’re slowly coming around! LOL
And I moved here, on purpose, to marry The Husband Dude…so it has been well worth it. 🙂
Allen T. St. Clair says
October 23, 2018 at 9:51 pmTulsa is actually a really cool area. I haven’t gotten to spend a lot of time there, but every time I end up there, I’m always impressed with the way it’s coming up in the world. JoJo and I actually talked about moving there once–but we wanted to get further away from where we are than Tulsa. No offense to Tulsa. LOL
Kat says
October 25, 2018 at 8:27 pmThere are some really nice parts of Tulsa, and some really cool architecture. I like my little town of Broken Arrow! 🙂
M.L. James says
October 23, 2018 at 9:55 amI’ll drink to that! Cherrs!
Mona
Kat says
October 23, 2018 at 6:48 pmCheers!
M.L. James says
October 24, 2018 at 3:05 pmI think I slurred my cheers! Sorry. Sober now. Dammit. Mona
Kat says
October 25, 2018 at 8:27 pmHaha!
Allen T. St. Clair says
October 23, 2018 at 1:20 pmJoJo and I are at lunch and I’m reading your blog. Like ya’ do. I forgot where I was and loudly said to JoJo: “Did you know medical marijuana is legal in Oklahoma?!” Cellarman’s Pub broke out into clusters of discussion groups.
Kat says
October 23, 2018 at 6:49 pmLOL. Glad we’re facilitating conversation on your lunch hour! 🙂
mydangblog says
October 23, 2018 at 6:23 pmMarijuana just became legal in Canada so we’re the cool kids now—no adulting here!
Kat says
October 23, 2018 at 6:50 pmYou ARE the cool kids! I’ve always wanted to visit Canada. Now I have more reason! 🙂
Romcomdojo says
October 26, 2018 at 9:45 amThis was such a fun read! Love your writing style, you have a great voice. I’m looking forward to reading more!
Kat says
October 26, 2018 at 6:08 pmThank you! I appreciate it!
Adie says
October 26, 2018 at 3:12 pmWine drinkers get the best glasses, I swear. I don’t drink, so I don’t have an excuse to buy fancy etched wine glasses with tongue-in-cheek sayings alluding to my mild alcoholism on them. And they wouldn’t make any sense with milk or water in them, anyway. Maybe chocolate milk?
What I’m trying to say is I want your skull goblet.
Kat says
October 26, 2018 at 6:10 pmYou know, you can use a skull goblet for anything!
Adie says
October 27, 2018 at 12:45 amTRUE!