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House Of The Missing Lady Parts

August 16, 2019 By: Kat16 Comments

What a week.

I turned forty-eight on Wednesday.

Let me repeat.

I. Turned. Forty. Eight.

I tried to find a funny GIF about turning forty-eight and this is all I could find:

It’s ok, though, because one of my besties just had her retirement party and she accidentally referred to her daughter as being twenty-eight. Her daughter is actually my age.

So, I’m twenty-eight, bitches. Deal with it.

Really, though, it was a good day. I took Shane to get his schedule for his Junior year of high school. I’m not sure how that happened at all. Wasn’t he just a baby bump, dancing around inside me every time I played music? Now he’s a dancing fool in the common area during lunch break.

He was sweet and after we ran the gauntlet at school, he told me to go home and chill. “You deserve all the chill you need for your birthday.”

Thanks Dude.

He was very proud of the fact that he ate his own face off his birthday cake.

I specifically requested a small cake this year because I have an issue with cake. The issue being, I can’t stop eating it. So, The Husband Dude was sweet and got me a cute little cake:

Even better…he got me tickets to see Heart and Joan Jett at the BOK Center in Tulsa in October. YAY!

Shout out to everyone who sent me birthday greetings…especially the former coworker who got me with this zinger:

Finally, Miss Lucy, our new kitten, has joined the rest of the females in our house (Kova the dog and me) in being Lady Partless. We had her spayed and when I went to pick her up, the vet laughed and told me she’s a very sweet girl when she’s stoned.

“So am I!” I declared, much to the vet’s amusement.

“Must be genetic,” she snorted.

I brought her home and she immediately went to the cat box, where she proceeded to lay down. When she realized she was on the potty, she did actually stand up and dig a hole so she could squat, but then she forgot what she was doing and sort of fell asleep while she was peeing.

Been there, done that, Baby Girl.

Mr. Luna was not happy with her because she smelled like that bad place kitties go to after they’re shoved inside a carrier and driven somewhere in the car. He has been hissing at her for a few hours now.

She is high and doesn’t give a shit.

Oh, I almost forgot! My blog had a birthday this week too! Angel Who Swears is two years old! Thank you all for continuing to read! You don’t know how much I appreciate you!

Stay weird, my friends. Normal is boring!

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Get a daily dose of humor on my Facebook and Twitter pages, check out snippets of my life on Instagram, and find all kinds of funny, weird, useful things on my Pinterest.

I want to see you there!

Comments

  1. M.L. James says

    August 16, 2019 at 2:43 am

    Kat, happy birthday to you and your blog! WooHoo! I’d wave to you, but I think we have that covered for the next few years! LOL. Your new Baby girl is precious! Mona 🎂🥂😘

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 16, 2019 at 9:31 am

      I think you’ve waved enough for the next four birthday! LOL

      Reply
  2. Rivergirl says

    August 16, 2019 at 6:14 am

    Well, Happy 28th!
    I’m seriously hoping you didn’t have a good enough time to fall asleep in the litter box… but these things happen when we’re you g.
    😉

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 16, 2019 at 9:31 am

      After my Hysterectomy, the drugs they gave me were good enough to make me fall asleep in the litter box, so I guess the kitty and I have a lot in common!

      Reply
  3. MamaTrek says

    August 16, 2019 at 6:37 am

    Happy Birthday!!!

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 16, 2019 at 9:32 am

      Thank you!!!

      Reply
  4. Tamra MorningStar says

    August 16, 2019 at 7:49 am

    I remember lunch convos about all the stuff you were going thru to get your blog up and running.
    2 years later and you’re a star!!
    Way to go my friend.

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 16, 2019 at 9:32 am

      Thank you! (((HUGS)))

      Reply
  5. Demolition Puppy says

    August 16, 2019 at 10:39 am

    Happy birthday!
    Oh, and at my pre-op appointment yesterday they asked who was going to be taking care of me, I said my mom. They asked how old she as, I said 45…. I’m 41… the guy looked at me like I was nuts. My mom is NOT 45, but I always think of her as being that old, turns out she’s actually 65. whoops. Guess I think of myself as being in my 20’s still, so win on my part!

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 16, 2019 at 10:58 am

      Win/win for both of you! LOL

      Reply
  6. Traci says

    August 17, 2019 at 4:25 pm

    A belated happy birthday to you! May all your birthday wishes come true!

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 18, 2019 at 4:21 pm

      Thank you Traci!

      Reply
  7. Rhonda says

    August 17, 2019 at 5:53 pm

    A belated Happy Birthday to you, Kat! Thanks for sharing about your stoned cat. Too funny!

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 18, 2019 at 4:24 pm

      Thank you! 🙂

      Reply
  8. Dsavannah says

    August 19, 2019 at 5:11 pm

    Happy birthday and happy blog birthday! We are the same age, tho I find it hard to believe I’m 48. I’ve known my husband 30 years. wtf?!?

    My blog is older tho, so I guess I win! 😛😆

    Reply
    • Kat says

      August 20, 2019 at 7:47 am

      Yes, you win! LOL.

      Reply

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This is my fancy author’s blurb.

Hi, my name is Kat. Angel Who Swears is a name bestowed on me by a good friend who recognized that I’m half girly-girl and half sailor on shore leave.

This blog is not political. It’s also not a mommy blog, couponing blog, or surviving-the-zombie-apocalypse-frugally-on-the-prairie-blog. It’s just real life with a side of snark, a dollop of sarcasm, and an extra helping of resting bitch face.
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